I dusted off my computer before I flipped the lid open. An old screensaver greeted me as the power coursed through to the plastic screen. I pulled up my blog but had to pause before entering my log-in because I honestly couldn’t remember any of my personal information.
And then I arrived here.
Hello. Hi. Bonjour. My name is Mackenzie. I used to blog here in my personal space, until 2020 overpowered me and I succumbed. I am sure many can relate and there is comfort in that. Hope as well. It is nice to know that we are not alone in this crazy world, to know that we are all feeling a collective weight and that we are truly all doing the best we can with what we have.
Which brings me to here, right now. This minute. I am back here on my personal blog, back here to my space where I can share words, and stories, and epiphanies. Oh, the epiphanies. I can’t tell you how many I’ve had just in the last two months, and boy are they some big ones! One such enlightening moment revolved around this blog. I missed connecting with fellow bloggers and it felt important to me to get back on track with that.
I have also made important personal changes in my life which I feel that I need to put out there in the universe. I am working on that blog post and it should be up in the next week or so.
Thanks to all that has encompassed this crazy year, I know now what is important and what is not. I know that there are things out of my control and my anxiety has to continually be okay with that. That every day is a new day to try again, to continue to learn from my mistakes.
That in the end I am going to be okay. It means that I am taking back control of my life and that “survival mode” is not a way to live. I am changing and maybe 2020 was a catalyst for that change, who knows. But I know that I can’t stay the same and that is a GOOD thing.
Welcome back, my friend! I have missed you and can 100% relate to the shitstorm that was 2020 and sucked the will out of everyone. It has been (or had been) a hard year and it did feel like the weight of world was carried on my shoulders, which now droop from attempting to hold it up. I am exhausted. And sad and angry and also, finally, a bit hopeful that things will get better. I’ve largely let my blog slide this past year too, with the occasional burst of energy to write something but wasn’t able to sustain that momentum for long. I’m hoping to do better this year, because like you, I miss the connections and need it to help nourish my weary soul too. Looking forward to all your epiphanies and seeing you back blogging again. Here’s to a better 2021!!
Hi Tanya! It is nice to be back 🙂
Yes 2020 was bloody awful and I hopeful that as the months go by in this new year of 2021, we can get back to *some* semblance of normalcy. In the meantime, life is still happening and while it is, I want to write! 🙂 I think everyone who did have a blog didn’t write as much as they used to. 2020 was simply crushing, it was difficult to pull up the ‘ol laptop and start typing for many.
Hope to see some posts from you as well this year, my friend! xx